Exit Jeb Left

*plop*
That plop wasn't the plop of me taking a s@#$. It was the plop of me dropping my last Oreo Cakester on the ground. You're probably thinking "There's no way in hell that Jeb would drop his last Oreo Cakester..." and I probably wouldn't have. If not for the fact that I think I saw a scuffle go down in the library... and only one person came out. I think.... that someone just died....

Holy S@#$!!! I can't take this anymore... I thought I could deal with this insane city, thought I could make some friends, thought I could have a good life here. I was mistaken.. Why did I move here in the first place... I need to contact Jonna, maybe I can live with her for a bit until I find better arrangements. Gotta start packing, gotta start packing.

~The next day~
Well, it's been confirmed. Someone was killed in the library yesterday. Edith Evans. I never knew her. But then again, I never knew anyone here.

I was able to reach Jonna, and she was more than happy to help me out. She's such a great friend. She said she'll pick me up at around 10:35 AM. It's 10:20 AM. I'll just wait here and....There's the charred library...I suppose... AH! Jonna's here early!

Jonna: JEB OEDKIRK!!! It's so good to see you again!!!!
Jeb: It's great to see you too Jonna! But can you hold on a second? There's something I gotta do...

~2 hours later~
A homeless man is walking out of the Drink and Drive. He's stumbling about, while singing Pure Imagination when he spots something. "Hmm? What in the hell happened to the library? There's soot everywhere..." He takes a few more steps, notices he steps on something and looks down. "A Sean Connery t-shirt? Why would anyone leave this lying around? There's a note too."
"To the person I never knew, I wish I did."

Jeb's Intuition

I went back to my apartment, hoping that maybe I could get a good look of the chaos outside from my window. All I could see were people dancing around a fire. I wondered if I could figure out what they were using to fuel the fire, but I realized that I was getting hungry and if I wanted to continue this stake-out, I'd need some steak take-out. Well not really, but I just wanted to re-emphasize how amazingly hilarious I am. I'll just grab this 36 pack of Oreo Cakesters and snatch my jug of Nesquik chocolate milk from the fridge. After all, you can never be too old for chocolate milk.

With my new reserves of food, I sat by my window, whipped out my telescope from the Discovery Store and I was in business. Alright sooo... wow, what a sight. The people are just throwing books from the library. I bet the librarian isn't too happy about that one bit... I wonder, was she killed in the raid? *finishes first 3 packs of Oreo Cakesters* What in the world is going on here? Has the world finally snapped? *chugs a large amount of Nesquik*

Jebba Jedda Flame, Bruh!

I felt a little discouraged. I didn't make a single new friend...I jogged around the entire town for once. I even felt like I lost 5 pounds. I needed some advice. Advice from an old friend.

Her name was Jonna LoSaft. and she was the coolest person I knew and my best friend since my high school days. She loved everything I did, comic books, manga, D&D, video games, Sean Connery, the list goes on. The most interesting part was that she didn't look like she liked any of those things. Her physical appearance was compared to that of the music artist Ke$ha, like Taylor Swift mixed with vodka, but still attractive nonetheless. These aren't my words though. Those are the words from the various onlookers who see her pass them by. To me, she just looked like a friend. We hadn't talked in a while but I hoped she still had her old computer addiction. All I had to do was log in to a D&D gaming forum. Logged in, now to search for the name...what was it again...sounded Spanish or somethin...Ah! There she is, JoLoSe7887! Now to initiate a chat.

JebRex8778: Jonna! It's me, Jeb!
...
JoLoSe7887: JEBEDIAH OEDKIRK! HOW ARE YOU??? WE NEED TO CHILLAX ASAP! WHAT'S YOUR ADDRESS??? I'M HEADING THERE TONIGHT!!!

Hmm, intended to get some advice, and ended up with an old reunion. Works for me. Just lemme tell her my address and...Wait, what's that noise...? It's coming from outside...I didn't notice either but it's lighter outside than normal..even though it's late in the evening.
No...way...a fire, people dancing around it...I'm curious. Despite the fact that it's my daily routine in checking out what's new in Marvel Studios, for once my curiosity of the unknown takes priority.

~8 Minutes Later~
Main lobby, almost outside. Now to just walk outside and see what in the Phantom Menace is going on- wait...did I just hear moaning in the bathroom..? Followed by a strange, wet suction noise...Where's the doorman...I think...I should just leave and ignore it all...I'm goin' back upstairs to sleep.